Parenting Habits That Are Holding Your Children Back

When it comes to parenting, we all want what's best for our children. We all want our children to become confident, responsible, and capable individuals.

However, sometimes, our well-intentioned parenting habits might unintentionally hold them back. Let's take a look at these bad parenting habits and discover how we can adjust our approach to better support our children's growth by adopting some of the habits of good parents.

Habit #1: Not Letting Your Child Make the Choice

When we make all the decisions for our children, we take away their chance to learn how to make choices and face the consequences. Allow your child to make age-appropriate decisions, whether choosing their clothes or deciding on a project. 

Parent: "I've picked out your clothes for school today."

Child: "But I wanted to choose my own!"

Change the approach to:

Parent: "Here are a few outfits you can choose from. What do you want to wear today?"

Child: "I'll choose the blue shirt!"

It is one of the 7 key habits of highly Positive Parenting Solutions that helps them develop decision-making skills and a sense of independence. 

Habit #2: Not Letting Them Make Mistakes

It's tempting to prevent our children from making mistakes, but these experiences are important for their growth. When we shield them from errors, we also shield them from learning opportunities. Love and Logic Online Parenting approach encourages your child to take risks and learn from their mistakes. 

Child: "I don't get this math problem."

Parent: "Let me do it for you."

Change the approach to:

Parent: "Try solving it this way. If you get stuck, I can help you figure it out."

Good parenting habits include allowing children to make and learn from their own mistakes. This builds resilience and problem-solving skills.

Habit #3: When We Don't Really Listen

Sometimes, we think we're listening but just waiting for our turn to speak. Genuinely listening to your child means giving them your full attention and understanding their feelings and thoughts.

Child: "I'm so excited about my art project!"

Parent (distracted): "That's nice. I'm busy right now."

Change the approach to:

Parent: "Tell me more about your art project. What's your favorite part?"

This approach helps build their confidence and shows them that their opinions matter.

Habit #4: Over-Compliment

While positive reinforcement is important, excessive praise can lead to unrealistic expectations and pressure. Instead of constantly complimenting, focus on acknowledging effort and progress. 

Child: "I cleaned my room!"

Parent: "Wow, you're amazing! The cleanest room ever!"

Change the approach to:

Parent: "I'm impressed with how you organized your books and put your toys away. That's a great effort!"

This helps your child understand that growth comes from hard work, not just praise.

Habit #5: Expecting Perfection

Expecting your child to be perfect can create unnecessary stress and fear of failure. Embrace the idea that mistakes and imperfections are part of learning. 

Child: "I got a B on my test."

Parent: "You should have studied harder. This isn't good enough."

Change the approach to:

Parent: "You worked hard on this test. Let's see what we can do to improve next time."

Show your child that making mistakes is okay and a natural part of growth.

Habit #6: Don't Show Them What to Do… We Tell Them

It's easier to tell your child what to do than show them. However, demonstrating actions can be more effective in teaching. For example, show them step-by-step instead of just telling them how to clean their room. 

Child: "How do I make a sandwich?"

Parent: "Just spread the peanut butter and jelly on the bread."

Change the approach to:

Parent: "Let me show you how to make a sandwich. First, spread the peanut butter, then the jelly. Now, you give it a try."

This helps them learn by doing and improves their skills.

Habit #7: Don't Encourage Them to Try and Fail

While supporting your child is important, avoiding situations where they might fail can limit their learning experiences. Encourage your child to try new things, even if there's a chance they might not succeed. 

Child: "I want to try out for the school play."

Parent: "What if you don't get a part? Maybe it's better to skip it."

Change the approach to:

Parent: "Go ahead and audition for the play. It's a great way to try something new, and I'm proud of you for giving it a shot."

Encouraging your child to try new things, even at the risk of failure, is a good parenting habit. It teaches them that effort and courage are more important than always succeeding. 

Final thoughts on these 7 habits of highly effective parents

By making small changes to these common parenting habits, we can better support our children's growth and development. Allowing them to make choices, learn from mistakes, and try new things helps them become more confident and capable individuals.

Thanks for reading!